Author: Blight Bane John

Annaliese Nielsen, the child pornographer

Those of you who know about Cœur de Pirate have been waiting for this, and here it is. We have put together evidence that demonstrates Annaliese Nielsen knowingly produced child pornography in 2007. If she did not knowingly do so, then she knowingly violated U.S. Code § 2257 regulations, in failing to keep records proving that all participants in sexual entertainment are above 18. Child pornography is defined, both in America and Canada, as erotic material depicting someone under the age of 18. This is Cœur de Pirate This young woman is at the center of the matter. She is the French-Canadian...

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Annaliese Nielsen: The movie

This showed up in our inbox. The site shown is LA Casting. We have no idea who is making this, or for what. It’s clear that for $200, the Annaliese role will not be the focus of the movie. If you have more information, please tell us.  ...

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Annaliese culturally appropriates the colors of the wind

From someone who was so concerned about a hula doll being a form of cultural appropriation, this is pretty funny. We found this on Annaliese Nielsen’s Tumblr before she made it private (probably thanks to us outing the fact that she is totes cray!).   If you’re wondering, we’re currently working on our most damning investigation yet. The mud will fly from our hands like stupidity flows from Annaliese Nielsen’s...

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Inside the mind of Annaliese Nielsen

When we all first met Annaliese Nielsen, she was drunkenly berating a Lyft driver. Most of us recognized she might not be of sound mind. Even when drunk, normal people do not think that hula dashboard ornaments are monuments to racial oppression. Over time, our site has revealed other signs that Annaliese might not be right in the head. There was that time she tried to frame a guy for rape and arson, or the time she tried to destroy a small business. She’s also deeply conflicted about her own ethnicity, using a token amount of Chinese ancestry in her otherwise Wonderbread...

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